No 1 Cares

Monday, July 11th, 2022 – Safeway

Yet another nice walking day. True to tradition, summer in Seattle began on July 5th and has been mild so far. We removed a messy roadkill rabbit from the road but found some money.

A shiny penny and a well run over quarter. A good start for the week. Well, except for the roadkill, of course.

Following up on the summer theme, we saw our first butterfly of the season.

It is a Tiger Swallowtail according to Washington State University. We saw two of them flitting around. The article states that the female searches for places to lay eggs and the male searches for females. Not too different from humans. Well, most humans anyway.

We found a couple of tools.

A very nonfunctional funnel and a very functional pair of scissors. That is fine. We have found several funnels and do not need any more. We have also found other pairs of scissors, but we can always use more to cut up random trash we pick up. Like wrecked funnels.

We picked up a Spanish Bible, New World Translation of the Holy Scriptures.

There is an inscription in it. It was sad since we found the bible abandoned at a bus stop.

Last week, we found a destroyed iPhone. Today we found another small part.

Guess the Apple brand is really strong.

We found a discarded photograph.

We don’t understand why they tossed it. Afterall, they seem so happy. Okay, perhaps blurry, but still.

Then, another picture.

This one advertising a one size fits all wig. This is the second one of these we’ve found, both empty. Chuck keeps hoping…

Tuesday, July 12th, 2022 – Park-and-Ride

Yet another nice day to walk. Perhaps that is why we awoke and started our walk twenty minutes earlier. Really, up at 4:45am? We must be getting old. Nah!

We didn’t find any money but needed to remove two roadkill from the street. A large a rabbit and a large rat. When we started to pick up the rabbit by a hind foot, it kicked back, but otherwise remained still. It was still barely alive. We gingerly picked it up and laid it in the bushes to expire in peace. The rat, on the other hand was flat and did not put up a fight.

We didn’t find a tool.

A completely smashed bungee cord. A nontool.

Another discarded Music CD.

“The Notorious B.I.G. Greatest Hits.” Evidently not so great.

Someone had a party at the park-and-ride.

A bunch of trash including three empty fifths of tequila. Also, McDonalds wrappers, stolen mail, and a couple of Amazon envelopes. Oh, while we’re at it, why not burn a bunch of rubber off our stolen tires?

Another lost key fob.

A Viper key fob is an aftermarket replacement remote entry device, which means the owner has lost his keys before. The small silver piece at the top is labelled Nissan, so the key on the right is probably a Nissan key. The key to the matter is that neither are in any condition to go into our lost key collection.

While running an errand, we spotted some debris a bit farther up Simonds Road than we normally go. We were rewarded with two car parts.

A nondescript wheel cover and a Ford hub cap. Neither were keepers and got recycled.

We found an old stogie in the gutter.

“I smoke old stogies I have found, short, but not too big around.”

It may be too long for Roger Miller, but our friend Steve is not that particular.

So, this was cool. We passed a traffic signal that had failed and blinking red in all directions. We passed a Kirkland Public Works Technician with the controller cabinet open.

We said we always wanted to see what was inside these cabinets and he gave us a quick tutorial about how it worked. Chuck found it very interesting and appreciated the details. We seldom learn new things on our walks. Well, sure, new things about trash, but not new nontrash things. Trash still amazes us.

By the way, he said that the main controller had failed. When we passed by again about twenty minutes later, the signals were working, and the technician had gone about his business.

Wednesday, July 13th, 2022 – Safeway and 100th Ave NE

It was a bit cooler this morning which was fine. It is getting darker, and we have started wearing our walking lights and flashlights for the first part of our walk. This is also the first walk in our new shoes. We retired our old shoes with 673 miles on them. We definitely have more spring in our step. We removed a small rat from the road but also found money.

Only two cents, but it is still, it’s money.

As we started out on our walk, we found a pair of sunglasses.

They were not in good shape, but they were giveaways. On one earpiece are the logos for Albertsons and Safeway. On the other was the logo from the local ESPN radio station. It’s no wonder they tossed the glasses.

We found a tool.

A perfectly-good bungee cord, totally unscathed.

Then, another lug nut.

The stud was sheared off with this one, so a catastrophic failure. Sounds bad, but it probably just popped off instead of slowly unscrewing. Unless, of course, all of its buddies decided to leave at the same time. But we only found the one.

Another half-empty can of Reddi Wip.

We’ve found several of these and can’t help but wonder why people only use half of it and what they use it for. Okay, get your mind out of the gutter, we’ve discussed those ways in a past blog.

Number 1 Cares.

At least that is what we thought it said. After some research, it means No One Cares. Like, “No one cares about the great round of golf you had.”

Then things started getting a bit weird. Just past the 7-Eleven on Juanita-Woodinville Way, we found a picnic site.

There was no one around, and besides, it was only about 5:45 am.

Outside the KinderCare on Juanita-Woodinville Way NE where we normally find toys to toss back over the fence, there was a man sleeping.

As we walked by, he stirred but remained asleep. Twenty minutes later when we passed by on the opposite side, he was still there. He probably stayed until recess at the KinderCare.

At the end of Juanita-Woodinville Way was a bunch of blankets and perhaps clothes on the traffic island.

Again, nobody was around except for the passing traffic.

On our way back at Safeway, there was a discarded bag of food.

A jar labelled Rice Flour but had a milky liquid in it, a container with a half-eaten chocolate cake and an unopened, unidentified food. Okay, maybe not so strange being at Safeway. But it was in a Target bag. Weird.

Okay, that should have been weird enough. But wait! There is more. On the way up safe-and-sane Norway Hill heading for home, we find another bag.

This one had a Puerto Rico hat, a Brasilia soccer jersey plus keys and a lot of personal stuff. We figured it fell off someone’s vehicle. We picked it up to carry home. There might be some identifying information in it.

On the way up the hill, we spotted a stranger coming toward us who appeared to be looking for something.

We asked him if he was looking for something and he answered “No, well I lost a phone a few months ago.” We said okay and continued on our way. As we proceeded home, we thought it was very strange that he appeared to be looking for something, and we had something. We got in the car and drove back over the hill and sure enough, he was still walking the hill. We stopped and asked if he had lost something. This time he answered, “Yes, a small bag.”

He was very happy to get it back and thanked us profusely. Guess we need to be more explicit in asking our questions. Anyway, a happy ending to a weird walk. This is the eve of the Full Buck Supermoon. We may get a picture tomorrow morning.

Thursday, July 14th, 2022 – 160th to 124th Street

Another day, another two cents.

Yep, same as yesterday. We’re not going to get rich this way. And we removed a rat and a crow from the street. Well, not really. Yes, the rat and the crow were real, but when Chuck started to remove the crow from the road, two other crows flew in.

They stated squawking at Chuck. He gently moved the deceased crow to the side of the road and quickly proceeded up the hill leaving the squawking behind hoping the crows did not blame him for their friend’s death. Those crows were probably the undertakers for the funeral.

This is our newest walk along the street near the freeway where evidently, folks pull off the road to stretch their legs and other body parts before continuing on.

First, the 14-Hands wine lovers with their fast food.

This week, it was three 14-Hands wine bottles and seven cans. There was also a Taco Time bag because you need something in your stomach if you are going to drive on the freeway after consuming that much wine. If they were drinking tequila, it would be too dangerous.

Great, someone dumped a camper shell.

We have no words that we can say about this kind of person. Well, none that we can publish. We will report it to the City of Bothell that have been great at picking up the things we report. Unlike the City of Kirkland that is mostly helpful but push back where possible. We are happy to live in Bothell.

Finally, how could we leave the freeway road without finding a condom.

Okay, not really a condom, but a condom wrapper with a microfiber cloth for cleanup. Maybe the guy is still wearing the condom as a trophy of sorts. Nearby, there was a Plan B Emergency Contraceptive. She was really playing it safe.

We found a punch.

It had been run over several times but was still usable. It’s a punch, for goodness sakes. It probably took out several tires along the way.

This is not happening on our watch.

On the traffic island near the freeway, a panhandler left trash the well-meaning, but naive people have given him. We will pick it up, but wise up people.

Today, we found a neckerchief.

It looked like something the guy from yesterday was wearing. In fact, when we unfolded it, it was the Puerto Rican flag. He was nowhere to be seen, so we will call finders keepers on this.

Friday, July 15th, 2022 – 100th Ave NE

Okay, yet another two cents today, but it could have been better.

On this once-per-week walk, we pass a Dairy Queen and Janet spotted a penny down in a crevasse beneath the drive-up window. She has been unable to retrieve the penny and is convinced there are even more coins hidden in the cache. We have a meeting set up later this week to discuss potential retrieval strategies. Janet is optimistic, but Chuck is doubtful. After all, it is like raising the Titanic.

Some food leavings.

At a bus stop, a McDonald’s McCafe Pie… in a rectangular carton. Also, a Chipotle Doordash meal. So, was all this delivered to the bus stop? We’ll never know. Then later at a path near a bridge, a half-filled carton of milk. The weather has been warm, and it has evidently been here a few days. We poured the milk out in clumps.

Mirror, mirror on the ground, who’s the handsomest guy around?

Well, Chuck didn’t see his reflection.

Another pair of destroyed sunglasses.

We find a lot of these, but these were prescription sunglasses. Okay, they were Kirkland Signature sunglasses from Costco, but still.

Here we are, on Friday. The time to check out Chuck’s vest pocket.

Two Pokemon cards. We still do not understand that game, and no, we do not want to. A pair of unopened earplugs. A piece of plastic that, we think, is a disposable weed whacker blade. A beat-up cat’s eye marble, another hair band and, as a bonus, a hair clip.

A thumb-tightened hose clamp, something we have never seen. A bunny nose. We’ve seen many of these, but they are normally on a roadkill rabbit. Another Nerf bullet. A Techron gift card with a zero balance. Yes, we checked. That’s okay, it is probably only designed to fill your tank for twenty bucks. Right.

An Amazon employee business card for a “Senior Principal Security Engineer.” We think he is the guy checking badges at the front door.

Then, there is the Four Elements Realty card with the cryptic symbols.

After some research, we found that the symbols clockwise from the top are Earth, Air, Fire, and Water. We think they ought to study up on the periodic table. Perhaps the four elements are named after the traits of the four founders of the company: one old as dirt; an airhead; one who loses his temper easily; and one who needs to get up three or four times a night to visit the bathroom. You figure out which is which.

Okay, now for a bonus round. We needed to take the car in for a checkup and decided to walk around the area. We tried to not pick up any trash because we were not prepared but did carry a bag and picked up a few things. A rule we adopted is, if we picked up something we were not allowed to put it back. We brought back some trash but also some more interesting stuff.

On the left is a runover “herb grinder” for grinding marijuana. We have two of these in our collection of drug paraphernalia, both in much better condition than this one. Also, a pair of gloves, ten tire weights, a lug nut, and a rusty nail. The nail wasn’t that interesting, but it was in a travel lane, so we can say we saved some driver from a flat tire.

Saturday, July 16th, 2022 – Riverside Drive

We didn’t need to remove any roadkill today and found more money.

Twenty-eight cents. Two pennies and a nickel along the road, then at a bus stop, someone left us a twenty-one-cent tip. That was nice.

We found two keyrings today.

The first was a small, special-purpose key near the Sammamish River Trail. They put a brightly colored strip on it so it wouldn’t get lost. Lot of good that did. The other keyring had four keys on it and were across from the apartments on Woodinville Drive. Neither set had any way to identify the owner, so they ended up in our lost key collection.

Hard Kombucha.

We do not know much about kombucha, but it normally contains a small amount of alcohol. Well, why not increase the alcohol to five percent and while we’re at it, make it a Guava Mimosa flavor.

Near the trailer park on Riverside Drive we found a bracelet.

It does not look very expensive and still has part of the label on it. Perhaps whoever lost it thought the label was part of the decoration.

On the freeway, a pillow got away and fell under the freeway.

We have often thought about something falling from the freeway above and hitting us. If that were to happen, we think a pillow would be a good choice.

Also under the freeway, a jawbone.

It may be an opossum, but we’re guessing. We are pretty sure it was not hit by the pillow.

Along Woodinville Drive, a camper has been parked for the past few weeks and has a generator running. Today, we had a spectator.

It was probably wondering if we had any roadkill in our bags. The cat outstared us, and we moved on to Brickyard Road.

Real Estate Agents hire companies to put the for sale signs up. This truck is going to be a few signs shy of a load. We could have some fun with these. We could put them up on random houses. And include the “Sold” sign.

Near a bus stop, another water bottle with yellow liquid in it.

The bus must have been late.

Someone dumped a bunch of garbage down an embankment.

We picked it up and placed it near the sidewalk. We will contact the city for them to pick up. We could probably handle the boxes in our car, but the shelving is large and heavy. Pigs.

Another used condom.

“Large Size Condoms.” That should impress the girl. Unless it falls off, of course.

On the freeway offramp, a semi tire.

Great, replace the tire and just leave the old one. What a mother trucker.

Heading for home down Juanita-Woodinville Way, we found a fortune.

Well, we cannot commend them on their timeliness, but our new shoes do feel good.

While running an errand later in the day, we passed the pile of blankets we saw on Wednesday and decided to collect them.

There were three blankets, all in reasonable condition. We shook them out and will wash and put them in the Goodwill pile.

That finishes our walking week. Our take:

  • 61 cents.
  • 14 tire weights, ten on one walk.
  • 6 keys, one smashed and one weird.
  • 5 balls, most returned over the nearest fence.
  • 3 lug nuts.
  • 2 pairs of sunglasses, broken.
  • 4 blankets for Good Will.
  • 1 Puerto Rican Flag.
  • 1 Tutorial on the operation of traffic lights.

Have a good week and remember, a new pair of shoes will do you a world of good!

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