Chuck had a Trying Tuesday

Monday, March 5th, 2023 – Safeway

This morning was a cool 34°F (1.12°C) with no rain. We didn’t find any roadkill, but Janet found twelve cents at her favorite fishing spots.

Meanwhile, Chuck found a pair of men’s undershorts.

Yes, it brought back long-buried memories of underwear past. At least these were clean, relatively. And we are pretty sure the puddle is rainwater.

Okay, we may have missed a few walks this week. We visited some good friends who were vacationing in Boulder City, Nevada near Lake Mead, and Hoover Dam. The daytime temperatures were in the 65°F (18°C) range. We had a great time. We toured Hoover Dam for the third time, visited a gold mine and the Atomic Museum. And no, we did not wager a single cent gambling. After all, every cent we find is hard-earned. We are not about to toss a penny in a slot machine. Like, yes, they have penny slots. If they did, the jackpot would be like a Tootsie Roll. We just enjoyed a week of good food, good sights and great company. And did we mention it was about 65°F every day?

Saturday, March 11th, 2023 – Riverside Drive

Back to reality. We flew back on Friday and were able to close out the walking week with our Saturday walk. The morning was relatively warm at 39°F (4°C). Did we mention it was 65°F in Boulder City? Anyway, we did remove two rats from the road but were rewarded with thirty cents and a half dollar.

Literally. Well not quite a half dollar, more like two-fifths of a dollar but almost a half dollar. Try convincing the bank of that.

But we did also get a tool for our collection.

A very small 7mm socket, but still.

Along Riverside Drive, a telephone pole was damaged by a vehicle.

Nearby, we found these.

We figure they are related. After all, it is distracted driving. But they evidently went back for seconds. Guess we could understand that.

Student 11, Period 3: “Your dad never came home last night. He’s been locked up.”

Congratulations, Principal’s Office. Great way to notify a kid.

We have not found one of these in a long time.

At one time, we were finding so many of these that we purchased a “sharps” container. It is about one-third full, but we are happy to fill it slowly.

Uh-oh. Someone became unhinged.

Approaching the northbound onramp to I-405, someone dropped a box of hinges and other miscellaneous garage door parts. We counted eighteen hinges, which is seriously unhinged.

So, in Washington State, we have a lottery that uses what we call the Scratch-and-Lose cards. They also supply “coins” to scratch the cards. We’ve found several of both the cards and the coins.

However, today we found three, apparently unused scratch coins. Do some of the lotteries pay off in scratch coins?

Yes, this is what it looks like.

It was left by someone on the freeway offramp. Come on people, there are two service stations within 500 feet!

We found two articles of clothing today.

If they were left by the same woman, she sucks at color coordination. Well, yes we suppose it could have been a man.

Monday, March 13th, 2023 – Safeway

Today was a warmer 44°F (6.7°C), but it rained heavily throughout our walk. We discovered that our rain jackets are not as waterproof as we thought, and we arrived home soaked.

We did not find any money but did find two tools.

A small bungee cord in reasonable condition and a small screwdriver which was not. It was rusty and may not find a permanent position in our found tool collection. The judges will need to decide.

Someone lost their Mercedes Benz new-car license.

It could be the same lady who lost her hat and undies on Saturday. We’ll keep an eye out in case she lost something else.

Baby needs a new pair of shoes.

Literally.

A broken bottle of nail polish.

Trust Fund Beauty. Does that mean you need to break into your trust fund to afford it?

Another severed head.

The kids at the KinderCare are brutal. There was also a blue giraffe, but its head was still attached, so we tossed it back.

Tuesday, March 14th, 2023 – Park-and-Ride

It was cooler and dry this morning. Again, we found no money and needed to remove a very dead rabbit from the road. This was a rough day for Chuck. He found eight Mike’s Hard Lemonade cans, several that required forages down steep banks and through the brambles. But there is more. Read on.

We did find another tool.

Well, part of a tool. It took a while and a lot of help from Google to determine what it was. We found one on eBay and is called a Vintage Knife, Scissors and Garden Tool Sharpener. We don’t know exactly how old it is, but anything on eBay that is more than ten years old is called “vintage” and the price goes up.

At the freeway offramp we found three unopened bottles of water.

The guy who plays a guitar here must be stocking up for summer. We left them.

A bit later, we found another water bottle.

This one was a butt bottle. Instead of tossing their butts out the window, smokers drop them in a water bottle then toss the water bottle out the window. No, we don’t know why, but maybe they are the same people who use a dog poop bag to pick up after their dog then toss the bag. Just a theory.

Another lost lug nut.

We’ve found a few of these before, spline-drive lug nuts. They are another form of locking lug nuts that do not really lock but just require a special tool to unscrew. And yes, we have found the special tools also.

This may be the most expensive “free” item we have come across on our walks.

A Husqvarna riding lawnmower. We don’t know what model this one was, but new they run $2400 and up. We don’t know what shape it was in, but the grease stains on the cardboard sign may be a hint. However, it was gone the next day.

At the top of the Tolt Pipeline, we found a paint can top and cardboard box with a symbol painted in it.

We couldn’t make heads or tails of it, and neither could Google Translate. Then we looked around and saw this.

They tagged the barrier. Now that we have a full word, we can take a stab at the meaning. It looks like “INSITE” with a squiggle arrow which we will ignore. So, “INSITE” is not a word in the English language but there are a few hits for it on Google search:

  • “InSite is a website designed for students and employees of Contra Costa College, Diablo Valley College and Los Medanos College. Everything you need to be a successful student.” Somehow, given the intelligence level of someone who would do this does not scream college.
  • “Macy’s HR Portal.” Nope, probably not that. Hopefully Macy’s hiring targets are a bit higher than this. Besides, they would use red paint.
  • From Wikipedia, “Insite is the first legal supervised drug injection site in North America, located at 139 East Hastings Street, in the Downtown Eastside (DTES) neighbourhood of Vancouver, British Columbia.” Okay, given the apparent intelligence level, this is a possibility.

Okay, maybe they are just bad spellers?

  • Did they mean “In Sight?” Well, yes, the guard rail is in sight, but is still nonsense.
  • Did they mean “Insight?” Possibly, but we don’t see their squiggly arrow as a great insight.
  • The only thing left is “Incite” which would mean to incite a squiggly arrow which, again makes no sense.

So, we are left with this nonsense tag that someone has chosen to make their life’s work. Good luck with that. We suppose you could get a job flipping burgers to continue to make your “name” in the world. It will make a great story to tell your grandchildren. Whoa, wait, you are not going to procreate, are you. Yes, “Procreate” is a big word. It means to have sex without protection. Please tell us you are not planning to have kids.

We pulled an automobile starter motor out of a ditch with water in it. We might find an occasional Mike’s Hard Lemonade can here, but this is the first car part we can remember.

Chuck tried several attempts at coaxing the motor up the bank, but it was too heavy for the picker and it kept sliding back down into the water. Finally, Chuck got down on one knee and pulled it out by hand. Then getting up, he lost his balance and fell back into the ditch.

The whole painful sequence can be seen here.

Only his ego was hurt. He dropped the starter in a nearby recycle bin.

But the starter motor was the tip of the iceberg. A little farther down the hill, we saw a bunch of car parts that were tossed down the gulley. Chuck again descended the bank and tossed or pulled all the parts up to the road.

The yellow oil jug was full of oil and Chuck tried a few times to toss it up the bank. Finally, he got it to stay at a place where so he could reach it from the top. When all the parts were at the top, Chuck gathered everything into a pile and Janet started after the oil jug with her picker. Just as Chuck said, “I’ll get that”, the jug slide back down the hill.

The second painful video is here.

Wednesday, March 15th, 2023 – Safeway and 100th Ave NE

This was a much easier day. We did need to remove a roadkill Salamander but did find some money thanks to Janet’s secret sources.

Two quarters, both lying in plain sight. Easy pickings.

And we also found two tools.

A drill bit, a bit rusty, or is it a rusty bit. But you get a bit of the idea, right? Also, another lost socket for our socket jar.

We found a kid’s book in the middle of the street.

It was the “You’re My Little Cuddle Bug” book. Unfortunately, this one was the “You’re My Squashed Cuddle Bug book.

What? Again?

We found two more bags of car parts that we missed yesterday. The good news is that we contacted the City of Bothell through their website, and they picked up all the car parts the next day. We have nothing but the highest praise for the responsiveness of the Bothell employees to our requests. We imagine the eye rolls, but they are always prompt and follow up with us. We do have a couple of stories about Kirkland, Woodinville and King County that are not nearly as glowing.

Thursday, March 16th, 2023 – 160th to 124th Street

Relative to the previous days, today was downright boring. This is the day we walk our newest route that used to be a mess, but today we found very little. We at least usually find several 14-Hands wine bottles and cans, but for the fourth week in a row, nothing.

The only thing of interest was a dog collar.

It had the dog’s name, MAX on a tag plus a phone number. We texted the number, but we received no response. It also has a veterinarian’s name on the tag, so next we will contact him. More to come.

Friday, March 17th, 2023 – 100th Ave NE

Today was a cold 32°F (0°C) but we were prepared for it. We did find some money.

Seven cents. A nickel and two pennies, one blurry and one not. These were again found at Janet’s secret coin sources. So, after many years of Chuck being the breadwinner, the role has suddenly turned to Janet. And Chuck is fine with that. Just wait until she faces her year-end performance review.

We did find a nice tool in a parking lot.

It’s an automatic center punch, about eight bucks on Amazon. It’s in great condition, so we’ll keep it. Unless you want to pay us nine bucks and we’ll consider it. You need to pay the shipping, though.

This is so embarrassing.

Another set of glasses making a spectacle of themselves.

It is ridiculous how folks just think things grow on trees. Take this hat for example.

Okay, this hat is actually hanging on a tree branch, but still.

Great, He lost his hat.

Now what do we do with it?

It’s Friday and time to check what has accumulated in Chuck’s vest pocket. Quite a lot.

We found a photo of someone unwrapping a gift. She looks familiar to us, but we cannot place her, but we do like the way she blends into the couch and floor. Two debit cards. This is the first PayPal card we have encountered, and it’s still valid. The second looks to be purposely destroyed.

A small trophy with the inscription “#1 Star.” It looks like someone tried to write something else on it, but we can’t make it out.

A Scooby Doo PEZ dispenser, empty. A spoon labeled “Hooked on Books and Froyo.” One number nine UNO Card. Or is it a six? No wonder they tossed the card. A seashell, a brightly-colored heart and a cleverly-camouflaged heart next to it.

Another Pokémon card that we have no idea what to do with. A wrist band, two hair bands and a key ring with no keys. A YoLo Massage loyalty card. With 10 visits, you get a free massage. Only one was checked before it got tossed. Not a good recommendation for the massage parlor. A nice pen that has been badly runover. And a tiny doll that looked to have a bad eye liner job.

On closer inspection, it might have glasses on, but we like the eyeliner story better. Wearing so much makeup at her age, the trollop.

Saturday, March 18th, 2023 – Riverside Drive

Today was a welcome 44°F (6.7°C) with no rain. We removed a very flat rabbit from the road and did not find any more money. We did, however, find some jewelry.

It was parts of one earring that had been runover in a parking lot just like most of the jewelry we find.

We retrieved a plastic bag down a hill on Woodinville Drive.

A dope pipe. We find these periodically, mostly broken. However, this person thoughtfully placed it in a plastic bag and tossed it into the soft weeds, so it was in perfect condition. It even had some product left in it. No, we didn’t try it. No matches.

In a single shopping bag filled with trash, we found urine bottles.

Three of them. Two Pepsis and one water. And no, we are not proposing a taste test.

On Brickyard Road, we picked up a magnetic sign.

Oh, well. Some partnerships were not meant to last.

That wraps up another week-and-a-half of TrashWalking. Our inventory:

  • 99 Cents. Didn’t quite clear a dollar.
  • 29 Mike’s Hard Lemonade cans.
  • 18 Hinges, from an unhinged sort.
  • 8 Balls, mostly returned to the owners.
  • 6 Tools.
  • 5 Roadkill including a salamander.
  • 3 Hats including you know who’s.
  • 2 Pairs of underwear, one white, one mismatched.
  • Many automobile parts.
  • 1 Half dollar, almost.
  • 1 Trollop with bad makeup.
  • 1 Severed head.
  • 1 Giraffe, blue.
  • 1 Jug of oil, twice.

Have a great week and remember, color coordination is important. You don’t want to get caught with your pants down.